Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize