I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
