At least make sure they are 18
Why
Duck Duck Cougar?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
