It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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