I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
