My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Actions speak louder than pants.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
