were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize