that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
