Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
