That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
