doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Randomize
