Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
