Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I could fuck to npr.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
