I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
