The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
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