Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
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