I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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