I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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