69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
