I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
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