Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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