i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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