Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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