Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
