I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Randomize