Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
