Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
