fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
