Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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