PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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