He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize