i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
