Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
