does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize