well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
