They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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