i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
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He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
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You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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