At least make sure they are 18
Why
Your tits are I can't wait for
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
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