I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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