I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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