So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
