i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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