so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize