So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
