its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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