if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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