I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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