he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Randomize
