After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
