where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
