Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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